The Polish health service is in a jock. Several hospitals in the ?l?sk region have had the pleasure of forming a close acquaintance with the bailiffs and it’s back in time to the Victorian era of Do-gooding as a whip around is organised to keep taxpayer-funded hospitals afloat. If this were happening in a socialist country it would be held up as proof positive that socialism does not work.

Many commentators are commentating on the reasons why the Polish health service is in a jock. Here I present a cut-out-and-paste version of office bingo to help you while away the hours of talking heads talking about why the Polish health service is in a jock. You have to choose just three of the following commonly proferred explanations of why the Polish health service is in a jock. As soon as you hear or read one, award yourself the given number of points. The winner is whoever amasses the most points.

Reasons why the Polish health service is in a jock:
1. the managers of hospitals are incompetent (1 point)
2. the managers of hospitals are corrupt (1 point)
3. trade unions (1 point)
4. Fidel Castro is a dictator (2 points)
5. all the nurses have got the hell out and are working for five times their Polish wage in Irish hospitals scrubbing toilets (2 points)
6. all the doctors have got the hell out and are working for ten times their Polish wage in Irish hospitals parking old people on trolleys in the corridors of Saint James’s hospital, Dublin (4 points)
7. Andrzej Lepper, minister for agriculture, is looking out for the interests of his constituents, the bastard (2 points)
8. the miners. They earn more than the average wage and they get to retire early, before their health is broken in half by the mines (2 points)
9. did I mention Fidel Castro? (2 points)
10. too many hospitals (1 point)
11. too few hospitals (1 point)
12. spies: it’s all a “provocation” (1 point)
13. Poles are too mean to pay for a proper health service. They’ll pay a bribe if it’s their own in-grown toe-nail but pay for the new hip of some old boot you’ve never even met before? Forget about it: that’s communism (25,000 points)