Supposing you, the prime minister of – oh, say, a central European country of around – for argument’s sake – 35 million people, wanted to smear someone – a former political ally, for example, who has started blabbing. And suppose this country is by now jaded with political scandals, what might you do? Also, you’ve tried and failed to set him up already. The state prosecution service is on side, so you could reach for the nuclear option: child pornography. But there’s a catch. Your obedient prosecuting attorneys have been just a little bit too obedient – Alberto Gonzales obedient, in fact – and digging up some child porn on your political opponent-ally-opponent (what day is it? Tuesday? Opponent) would be that little bit too obvious. Perhaps it would be better to smear him by association. He has advisors: take one of them out. But there’s another catch: the right to privacy. If you were to bring charges you would have to refer to the defendant by his or her first name and the first letter of the surname: Piotr T., for instance. But there’s a clever boy working in the state prosecution office. If charges aren’t brought, you can name the victim publicly. Et voila!

Any Polish legal eagles reading? Please correct me if I’m wrong about the right to privacy.